I Have A Theory

Mrs Ruth Kavuma Nvumetta is a Ugandan member of parliament. She represents the islands of Kalangala.
She was recently seen participating in the continent-wide reality TV show Big Brother Africa, prompting much distress. Big Brother Africa is known as a place for pointless social misfits to compete, if you can call it that, in idleness. They sit around in what is called the Big Brother House just scratching in their pants and rearranging their bits and hoping that, from this, they will gain some celebrity. The whole business is embarrassing and silly, because this isn’t dumbed down television: dumbed down TV needs to bend over and extend a telescope to see Big Brother.

This is no place for an honourable elected member of the third arm of government. How did she end up in there?

I have a theory.

I imagine her aide was rustling through her mail one day in her island MP office and came upon one letter. “They want you to visit the house next week, Hon.”

“We’re not that close, Aide.”

“No, when I say ‘Hon’ I mean short for Honourable. Not short for Honey.”

“They mailed me to invite me back to the house of parliament in Kampala?”

“No, this one is in South Africa.”

Oh, okay. So let’s fly to Johannesburg to visit the SA parliament.

Shwweeeee (That’s the sound of plane-flight)

And she found out too late.



  1. Shweeeeeeeee… the sound of me falling off my chair for ages before I lie on the ground laughing. It may also be the sound of socks… who knows?

  2. Oh no!!!! That theory totally makes sense. But also that MP hadn’t the aide been using the word “hon” before.
    On return the aide has to lose the job……

  3. No PR is bad PR. In both contexts it makes sense.

    Poor chick just wanted a little more attention. At the expense of our collective dignity, of course.

    Who are we?


  4. “…dumbed down TV needs to bend over and extend a telescope to see Big Brother.”

    These are the gems that make me love you.

    Well that, and this:

    Shweeeeeeeeee. 🙂

  5. This is the FUNNNIEST thing i have heard all week – i trully support your theory – can’t have happened any other way, surely!

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