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  • Did you know that Kelly Rowland has had plastic surgery? Of course you did. You have eyes in your head and can see that that is not the nose she was born with, that is the nose she got from the nose-store on Rodeo Drive. Cue earworm: “Then you say no-no-no-no-nosejob….”
  • Why can’t these local musicians produce, you-know, music with developmental themes, instead of just singing about nothing? Why don’t they sing about issues? The person who asked that question asked it as if it doesn’t have an answer.
  • I met Antipop. She is small in stature and not frightening at all. Not in the least.


Sentences that didn’t make it into the paper 1:

“You wish someone would wave a magical wad to make all your troubles go away.”


  • Big Brother is ending this weekend. The way I don’t give a rats shit is astounding me. I am stymied, flummoxed, bewildered. Morris can tell you the rest.
  • Speaking of Morris, do you think Maurice Mugisha, the dapper, articulate NTV news anchor, is thinking of using his middle name and introducing himself as 

Sentences that didn’t make it into the paper 2: (This is from a Q&A our boy submitted this week. The question is directed to someone who by some strange coincidence has appeared in three posts in a row

Q: Why did you abandon the Miss Uganda business?

A: I left the Miss Uganda business because I felt I had done enough to the Ugandan beauty pageant.