So fruck out

Okay, this right here...

                                                                                        …is fucking creepy.

It is called an “uncontacted tribe”, the politically correct term for people who have been living in the deepest isolation from the rest of the world, and I am completely fruck out by it.

They exist. Little pockets of them.

I always wince when I hear someone refer to members of a different ethnic or racial group as “them” but this time it came so naturally.

They are not us, they are them.

Little pockets of ‘em (which is even more detached than “them”) exist, apparently, around Asia, South America and Brazil, living their simple, uncomplicated lives as hunter-gatherers.

These ends we are haharing over whether to take DSTv’s latest price offer and finally install a satellite dish in time to watch the NBA finals, haharing over my next blog post, haharing over getting my StanChart Visa Debit Card reactivated, then suddenly this is thrust into my face; that in this world of mine, which I think is so vast and complicated and bewildering, there are hunter gatherers, living in populations of just around 100, who DO NOT EVEN KNOW THAT THE REST OF THE WORLD EXISTS.

You have no idea how much this is freaking me out.

Just the other day I was bellyaching about how one of the problems with the modern Ugandan is how landlocked he is, mentally. (Dudes never think beyond their immediate experience, you know, and it makes them narrow-minded and shallow, you get, eh? And they don’t even realise how superficial they are because they have never ventured far enough into the world’s sea of information to even countenance that further depth is possible. You know? I swear. It is tragic. Anywhoo.)

No, I don’t really say “Anywhoo.” I just put it there to lighten the tone of the paragraph. Come on. I don’t say “Anywhoo.”

I do NOT say Anywhoo. And anyone who tells you they have ever heard me say Anywhoo in their lives is a despicable liar and a traitor and a bag of smouldering, perfidious evil on legs!

(Deeeeeeeep breath.)

We were talking about the Uncontacted Tribes.

I was saying, this is the real out-freaking part: It is not just that they exist, it is that the people who found them…

… are going to leave them alone.

This is completely freaking me out.

I mean, look at this: these people living short, ragged lives, constricted and myopic, and not even knowing how much more is possible? How much more  you can do, how much more you can be as a human being, as a society. Isn’t there any one of them, maybe the one in the corner there—that one– who sometimes goes off alone to think, to dream, and then sighs when the sun goes down because he figures that he ought to abandon such fanciful notions because they are vain and useless and he needs to get back to what he thinks at least is the “real world”?

I swear.



  1. Totally freaky but I wouldn’t mind being left alone…imagine if they were contacted and had to bear with the same frustrations you’re putting urself through…to blog or not to blog…what i would give to be an uncontacted tribe

  2. but then again, it looks totally staged…i mean they just had to be near naked and pointing their bows at the plane; how cliche is that. Or maybe I’ve been watching too much tv

  3. I agree, leaving them alone might just be better rather than complicating their lives and making them dependent on our crazy world that is going to ruins so fast. Imagine in 2050 when we need oxygen tanks because of smogs, and the sun is too dangerous that we can no longer walk out doors with exposed skin. Imagine when the gas prices are so high that commuting to work is considered stupid.

  4. hm, can you go off into the sunset to dream and sigh about a world that you dont even know exists?
    maybe they’re not la-di-da and content with their world (actually find and aim at and shoot your dinner vs. buy it at supermarket and pop it into the microwave… can u imagine?!), they probably have their share of problems, but…
    our world to them is an unknown unknown. and i think they’re better off that way.

  5. That is so weird but I don’t see why we shouldn’t leave them alone. The only contact they have had with the outside world is the loggers who want to and sometimes do kill them for their land, do you blame them for wanting to be left alone? I can’t even imagine what it would be like for them to try and understand the world the way it is now, maybe if you got the children who are more likely to adjust.

  6. I still find this so hard to believe.

    What with all those searches of the anaconda and rare species in the deepest of the amazon…and these guys are still uncontacted???

    Kind’a like The God’s must be crazy, only crazier!

    In other news, hi Baz…

  7. Just been reading Bad Idea, Baz…u have made me laugh so hard today.


    Lol @ Akon being in jail inthe nineties.

    Penina has really been around. I know her too….not been with her that way though.

  8. Anywhoo, I envy them people. I think life, as we have it now, what we call “modern” and all, is fucked. Lucky bastards. Only little of modern life is good.

  9. hey baz, when you stop freaking out, you will realise that it is a good idea to just leave them alone. it would be barbaric i think to uproot them and bring them into this complicated world we live. you can not miss what you have not experienced before. i doubt they highly miss the internet. besides, do you really want to see another colonisation battle??

  10. i think those are just words. they will definitely be hunted. they wont be given a minute of peace, now that the world knows where they are. it’ll be like those Christian missionaries. they go into a place to help the unfortunate communities with things like drugs against malaria but they take back the stories of how richly endowed mulago hill is. the RGS gets onto the idea, even employs one of the men of the cloth to be an adviser and the next time you wake up, Mr van Winkle, your people have been enslaved and thrown out like used TP.

  11. Once we know that there’s a whole new world out there, we stop being complacent. Therefore, being found is only the beginning. Soon we start demanding that the minister of something should do something to develop our people more. Think Karamoja MPs.
    N.B: I said ‘WE’.

  12. anywho [that word again], tis actually better for them i would say. *contemplates packing bags and heading back to remote “home”.*

  13. That one, Baz.The one who wanders off and dreams will eventually become the Columbus of his world, when he finally finds a way to leave home.
    And then you can sit down and have a chat with him…

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