You know what would be really cool?

To walk through Nandos and shout lyrics of DMX songs into a mobile phone. As if you are having a phone conversation.




“This is not a fucking game. You think I’m playing? This is NOT A FUCKING

“How many times do I have to tell you? I HAVE NO FRIENDS!”


“I don’t know who you think you’re fucking with but I’m NOT HIM!”

And once you have the attention of all the little prissy boogie Nandoboys and Nandogirls, deliver the coup de grace: 

“Look, let’s dial up all the factors: You’re wack, your pussy, your girl’s a whore, you’re broke , the kid ain’t yours and everybody knows!”

Then, as you leave, stomping furiously every step of the way out…





  1. hmmm…it sounds crazy alright,but not impossible.It needs guys who have guts..
    Perhaps I could do the same for those waiters and waitresses who drag their feet while at work.Serves them right!

  2. You missed “X is gonna give it to you”

    @31337- If I were you, I would answer yes to Cheri’s question. If would be so ungentlemanly to town down someone who is feeling overly generous. Such opportunities don’t come around often.

  3. Now that I’ve read the post…LMBFBAO!!! (Laughing My Big Fat Black Ass Off!!!!!)

    That would be hilarious in Nandos. I like the bit about ” the kid ain’t yours and everybody knows!”

  4. We did get a room, just that the curtains did not have windows, or was it the other way round.

    Cheri sweetheart, do i want a piece of you, not really, i could do with pretty much everything you got!

  5. Am I meant to be here? Listening to Cheri and 31337 getting all flirty and hot for each other?
    K, DMX lines in Nandos? But Baz you’ve always hated on that place. Oba you think it’s a hangout for only bu local kids. Simanyi!

  6. by the time i finishe readin all these comments, i’d forgotten wat the post was all about. and i still dont remember, so maybe i will comment another time. wait. it was about nando’s. no, not that. it was about DMX. thats right. dog man x. yea. the one that got saved. the one that that that
    oh fck, am out

  7. I.Hate.Nandos.


    And I’m a really good warm fuzzy kinda person.

    Otherwise, I’ve lolled.

  8. and right after that l would drop an attomic bomb on that incompetent waitress at some restaurant read “kafunda” who had the audacity to serve me half cooked stuff even after it was quite clear they had lasted a week prior to making an appearance on my plate!!! and they were still half cooked probably the same stateher silly brain was in

  9. heheheheeh u can get a few hostages while your at it n hold them at gun point using a chocolate bar….wait that wasn’t gun point, it was….chocolate bar point….. only that i ate the chocolate n well… got caught…

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