The return of Scruffy Slick.

You may have been tricked by my deceptive outward appearance into thinking that I am one of those well-adjusted types– the type that would like to be acceptable in society. This false impression could have been caused by the fact that I have lately taken to tucking in my shirts and wearing decent trousers.

I am so sorry about the misunderstanding, but I only wear pants and a tie is so that they don’t kick me out of public places that I need to enter for purposes of doing my job. Essentially, deep within, I am still a slob. Here, inside, my soul doesn’t give a shit.

The other weekend I was invited to Silk Oxygen by a generous PR firm to attend the a media launch of the publicity campaign to inform you, the huddled masses, of the imminent arrival of British Reggae band UB40.

But before that…

I live in a semi-rural third world village on the border of Kireka and Bweyogerere. To get to civilisation, where I work, I have to tread the beaten path to the taxi stage.

That path is very very dangerous—it is either a tumultuous river of flowing dust and I kid you not this dust is so heavy and vigorous that it moves to attack you —or it is a treacherous waves of mud that gravitate to shoes and trouser hems.

In a bid to reduce on the horror my workmates will undoubtedly suffer if they see me arrive at the office after walking through the slough of despair, I do two things. I have a deal with Kaziro shoeshine outside the office. When I get to work, I pass him my shoes and he cleans the Kireka off them.
The second thing I do is I roll up my trousers. I roll them up out of reach of the mud, then roll them down when I get to the taxi.

On this Casual Friday, I got to work and suffered through the allotted toil and strife, until sevenish, time for my glamorous event at Silk Oxygen. While there, I was selected by your favourite radio presenter, The Fat Boy, to battle it out with Beena Baby and Brenda Nanyonjo in a quiz for the grand prize of 30k airtime.

You can see me totally kicking their asses in the picture below.

My moment of glory was tarnished however, when I saw the full set of photos the next day.

The entire day no one thought they should tell me that I had forgotten to roll my jeans back down?



  1. Man those chaps need VIMBOKS!!!! Just send me details of where they hang out..especially those who have kicommando for lunch…


    (And, um, don’t mean to burst your bubble or anything, but the correct answer is really f=457.43453456. It’s a common mistake, though.)

  3. Baz, you buy mwana akuula jeans? You are not growing any taller. You should be buying the right length of jeans.

    Did you get the airtime, or did Beena Baby beat you? That would be a shame!!!

  4. Lol @Magoo with the mwana akula jeans!!!

    Baz, I was about to say that next time don’t do balance but I looked again and saw the “jean” waist all the way up on yo chest!

    Ditto Magoo, U’re so chilling with the stars these days!!

  5. Baz darling, when I said you were 10 feet tall to me before I met you I didn’t mean you actually are and you should buy 10 foot long jeans! You really, really cracked me up. I’m seriously getting rib implants. And so, who won the airtime? Do tell please.
    @Kenyanchick: stop showing off your brainyness! Us we had no clue what the question was to begin with. Even me I want to be clever and correct Maths thingies.

  6. baz won the 30k airtime
    turns out he was intelligent about UB40 issues. well, if questions like what is UB40’s most popular song are intel. so he won. got 5/5. i bet the only 100% he has ever gotten in any exam. okay i wil confess. i am jelous. i was there. i wished fatboy could have picked me instead but no. he had to go and be star struck by baz. so here i am. beefing. baz pliz send me some me2u so we burry this hatchet. my number is 0772 000001… be wise.

  7. mwana akula jeans, LOL

    wonder why she’s called Biina Baby, her bum aint that big n she be far far away 4rm looking like a baby.

    Brenda Nanyonjo, now dats a sweet derriere!

  8. shyaa Ernest, you think when you do a fashion police on yourself we won’t still go behind your back and say: “Yii!Ernest!what is wrong with him?”?

    waaa!am so laughing at you!

  9. Am on your side uncle, you have a tall housemate and all your own jeans were dirty from the ‘mutant’ mud. It’s called ‘improvising’

  10. Are there “daddy jeans”, you know like those “mummy” jeans that are just so euuugh(high waisted-big hipped-narrow at the ankles-jeans that look so….euuuuwww)??? Baz is definitely wearing “daddy”jeans. Where were u gonna roll them to for real? Laughing. My. Ass.Off

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