1. Greet everybody by saying “Well done.”
2. Bid them farewell by saying “Nice Time.”
3. Get the hell off MTN. Warid, here I come.
4. Or Hits. Whatever. Either way, I am tired of MTN, Celtel’s adverts. are. stupid. and I am already on UTL anyway.
5. Become a chap who wears ties all the freakin’ time so that way I can finally get some respect around here. What about.
6. Two words: Joh. Nnie. Two more words: Every. Night. No more being a casual social drinker. Why should I continue with sucking life when I might just have dormant alcoholic’s genes that I could exploit?
7. Make my annual attempt to move out of Kireka earlier than usual. Maybe March.
8. Buy a car.
9. Hah hah. Just kidding about part 8. What part of “I’m broke” don’t you understand, banange? You give me the car money. I’ll find something to do with it. Like move out of Kireka, buy a Warid phone, some neckties, bottles of Johnnie Walker…
10. That’s ten resolutions.  Ten is enough. Time to go, now, so goodn–  Oh. I mean, Nice Time.

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